Alas, the days have come.

It's getting down to the last few weeks/days of my time with Ben and I'm starting to realize it. I wish I could freeze time just so we can have more of it. Every time I think about him leaving, I nearly break down. I don't know how I'm going to be able to function while he's away for so long. I wish he was in the Air Force or Marines, just so his deployments would be shorter.

Thank the Lord that my parents are coming out here to get me right after he leaves. I don't know what I would do without the tremendous support system that God has given me. I know I don't deserve any of them.

Recently, there have been many things tearing my world apart (so to speak). Within the last couple of weeks, we received news that some family members were horribly wronged and subsequently deemed unfit to carry out certain duties. The horrible thing is, I have seem them both work diligently and faithfully beyond what they were asked. I am so disappointed that the people who wronged them believe that this was the right thing to do and I pray that God has mercy on these people for what they did.

I, also, was recently accused of saying some things and acting a certain way. This person accused me of, as she put it "being a rude person" and saying derogatory things about her husband and people we know. Needless to say, I was very upset about this. First of all, I NEVER said ANY of what I was told I did. And, secondly, I found it funny that one of the things she accused me of doing, she turned around and did to me!

I'm sorry. I had to rant to someone. My little soapboxes tend to be loud and very angry in nature, so I thought it better written than spoken, lol.

I realized just the other day that everything going on right now is only extremely angering to me because I have allowed it to be. I know for a fact that I'm not perfect. And anyone who has spent any amount of time with me knows that. And I also know that one of my greater flaws is anger. I know I need to work on that.

I've also noticed my bent towards emotions. Believe me, this is not surprising. I have been told this for the past 20 years and I am finally starting to see how detrimental its effects can be on me and those I love.

On that note, I think I will sign off. Have a wonderful day!

Carpe Diem